Sunday, April 19, 2020

Falling in love

I've fallen in love
a couple of times
with myself.

How easily
I broke my heart.

Could you blame me
for giving it
to you for
safekeeping?

Lemonade

Thursday, April 16, 2020

I find solace in old poets

I find solace in old poets.
Poets who wrote
before these times.

They remind me that-

nothing worth feeling
hasn’t been felt before

everything worth feeling
is worthy of expression

I am not new-

still, I am 

I have not changed
unrecognisably-

even a world
in upheaval
does not change
its upheaving
all that much

They remind me that-

this world is human
because we 
preserved
and distilled
experience
in small 
airtight 
jars
of words
spaces
and colour

all beautiful things
are poetry
because
poetry
is
what makes the mind
stir and 
shimmer
like the moon 
in water
held by 
cupped hands

poetry is not a choice
it is necessity
for creating 
for preserving 
for being

They remind me that-

we are not alone-

the past
always gives
the present company

the present is 
another poem
waiting to
console a future- 

"we are here because,
       we are here because,
we are here"


A view

Thursday, April 9, 2020

Crybaby


Tapping my fingers on the table top,
The thirsty boy is sucking on his lollypop.
He’s looking at me like he’s made a choice
He’s twisted his smile and lowered his voice.

He says,
“The bar is getting empty and we’re still alone,
So common sad girl I’ll take you back home.
I see you nursing wounds with cheap spirits out here
Promise won’t ask questions when I see your tears.”

I say,
“Boy, you don’t know me, wish you had what it takes,
But I’ve really had my fill of stupid mistakes.
Sure, I’m lonely and I still don’t know why,
But babe, you’re not the lover who’ll see me cry.”




Tapping my fingers on the table top,
The pious woman suffers in the coffee shop.
She’s had enough of my rhythms and blues,
She thinks it’s time someone gave me a clue.

She says,
“Is this chair empty? Are you all alone?
Don't they teach you to be a lady at home?
Suck up your problems and act like your age,
You’ll look pretty if you smile so don’t be sad with rage.”

I say,
“Woman, you don’t know me and how far I’ve come,
I’ve really had my fill of trying to be someone.
Sure, I’m lonely and I still don’t know why,
But back off, mama, or you'll learn how to cry.”



Tapping my fingers on the table top,
The radio man's profit margins cannot drop.
He’s told himself he’s gonna save some souls,
He’s an honest man and justified in his goals.

He says,
“The world is ending and you’re all alone,
You have no say in your broken homes.
They’ll never understand you so listen to me,
I’m gonna teach you to hate and make lots of money.”

I say,
“Man, you don’t know me, what I fought to get here,
I’ve had my fill thinking of self-absorbed fears.
Sure, I’m lonely and I still don’t know why,
But you’re not the saint I’d pay to stop me cry.”



Tapping my fingers on the table top,
I’ve thrown out my scribblings and all that I've got.
Haven't eaten for days and I’m screaming inside
I’ve been wondering if death is a good place to hide.

I say,
“I know you’re empty and you’re so alone,
You can’t do nothing, you can’t make a home.
You’ll never be happy cause you’re such a fake,
Give up, we know you don’t have what it takes.”

I say,
“Hey, you don’t know me and what I can do,
I’ve had my fill hating myself cause of you.
Sure, I’m lonely and I still don’t know why,
But you’ll never get the best of me when I cry.”


No, they’ll never get the best of me when I cry.



Card IV: Rorschach Inkblot Test




Wednesday, April 1, 2020

She took me aside


She took me aside
And whispered
Her darkest secrets
Her deepest desires

Then
She left me
Unsupervised
Unearthing 
My own